Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Build Strong Families: Part 3--Jaimie Fales-Brown

I made some new friends a few weeks ago.

I was working late two Thursdays ago. Pastor Tom Ryberg was in the Welcome Center having just finished up practice for Koinonia’s Sunday morning worship. I came out of my office to speak with him and behind him, down the hall by the Choir Room, a boy walked in. He looked to be about 11 years old.

Even though it was dark, he had walked over to the church to find out if we were having anything special happening. Tom and I talked told him about the Halloween Spooktacular happening the next night and I gave him a flyer. My interaction with him struck me oddly. He seemed...lonely.

The next night, he and his little brother turned up at the Spooktacular. They talked with Emily Barda and I each with a sucker in their mouth, showing us the candy in their bags. I quickly realized two things: these kids have a great sense of humor and these kids were both hungry. Not only were they wanting food for their bodies, they were hungry for social connection for their hearts. They wanted someone to talk to them and laugh with them.

Even though it’s only been a week since I met them, the boys have come around the church quite a few times. Saturday morning, the older one helped the property clean up group rake leaves in exchange for donuts and “the best apple cider” he ever had.

I’ve answered questions from them about baptism and about “what that big, funny X is” (the cross on the wall in the Courtyard.) These kids aren’t coming to church to experience G-d in a church service. But they are experiencing G-d in the lives of Patrice Ott, Emily Barda, the Pastors, Lucy Lower, myself and others who have greeted them warmly and gotten to know them. They experienced G-d through Bev and John Goddard who served macaroni and cheese and cookies at Wednesday night dinner (admittedly, the kids ate more cookies than mac ‘n cheese.)
The Church is a place for finding social connection. We all need to experience G-d incarnated in the lives of people around us. We were not created to be alone. We were created to be hungry for social connection. Event like the Halloween Spooktacular give us the opportunity to reach beyond the four walls of the church to find new connections.

Every family is different. Every family has different needs. But all families need social connections to the larger community to be strong and resilient. As a community of faith, we know that this strength comes from G-d experienced in relationship with one another.

Pastor Tom Ryberg--November/December Congregationalist

“But seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exhile, and pray to the LORD on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare.” (Jeremiah 29:7)
When was the last time you took a walk just for the sake of looking around? Until this past week, I can’t remember that last time I did. 

Whenever I walk, I’m going somewhere in particular. From home to church is about fifteen minutes. From church to Brownstone Coffee is about five. Or if I’m walking to the hospital from church, it’s ten minutes. When I walk, it’s with the purpose of getting somewhere.
But last week, walking was its own purpose. I met Sue Day and Dan Byrd at the Walgreen on the corner of Capital and Emmett, and we started off on a prayer walk. We did so as participants in the small ReVision groups in order to help discern what lies ahead for FCCBC (prayer walks are part of that process.) These walks consist of picking a neighborhood and walking for about thirty minutes, paying attention to what we see and praying blessings as we go. “Seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you…”

Sue, Dan and I, we walked past an elementary school, a small muddy pond, several neighborhood homes, an elderly woman with three small children in tow. One beautifully manicured home had an ironic juxtaposition of signs ranging from “WELCOME!” to “NO TRESPASSING!” to “KEEP OFF THE GRASS!” One home had a huge tree stump outside of it. Several had Halloween decorations already up. We maintained an easy pace, not trying to cover particular ground but simply experience what came our way. Before long, it was time to turn back.

Something about this prayer walk and walking as its own purpose, made the time pass both more slowly and more calmly. It was a peaceful experience, and after even thirty minutes I felt a sense of gratitude and deeper connection to this small area of northern Battle Creek. I felt a sense of hope for the welfare of this corner of my community and pride at being a part of it. At this point, it’s hard to perceive much about what God’s future is for FCCBC and Battle Creek. But when it comes to discernment, I am coming to find that there is perhaps more value in a slow walk than if we had stayed indoors and made a quick action plan. May we seek, and find, the welfare of the city in which we make our home, and we trust that the welfare of FCCBC will follow.

Pastor Emily Joye--November/December Congregationalist

“For now we see in a mirror, dimly. We don’t know the future. But God does and I maintain God is way smarter than we are, holding the infinite possibilities for a variety of futures in Her loving, poetic heart”

Since our entire congregational focus over the next months in worship and fellowship is discernment, I thought I’d take this opportunity to share with you how I discerned it was time to move on from FCC. While this piece is testimonial and personal in nature, I hope you’ll focus more on the what than the whom. Because God knows discernment is an art, and while we all do it differently, there are some common denominators, trusted patterns worth noting.

Back in February, we celebrated Koinonia’s 4th anniversary. We celebrated big in worship. We had a potluck luncheon in the Courtyard after service. It was a glorious, joy-filled Sunday. After the party was over, as I was walked to my car alone, I surveyed the smattered snow on the ground. I felt a presence wash over me. In a matter of moments, I felt/heard a voice—a still small whisper—say, “Your time is done now. You can go.” It was a loving assurance, not an indictment. It was permission giving. I felt loved and held in the midst of that revelation.

Then I felt terrified.

I had no idea what to do if I was done. What came next? I’m a full time pastor with two young children. I can’t just quit without something to replace ministry—that would be foolish. Then I started spinning. What if the voice was just a made up figment of my imagination? What if I misunderstood the message? What if G-d was wrong? For about a week I told no one. In fact, I hid the revelation from myself pretty consciously. I had no idea how to act on what was given to me, so I rendered it obsolete. That’s where I went wrong. God didn’t tell me what to do. God didn’t give me directions. I got assurance and permission. But that wasn’t enough for me because it didn’t translate to action. I figured if God was talking, it had to lead me to direct behavior or life-style change, and I didn’t have a clue.

In a session a few months later, I reluctantly shared with my therapist what I’d heard that February morning and how much it vexed me. She lovingly asked me how hiding from God’s truth was working out for me. Truthfully everything had started feeling too small. I wasn’t experiencing much joy in ministry. Little things annoyed me. My spiritual reserves were coming up dry in preaching and pastoral care. I knew my time was done because I could feel it, not on paper, but in my soul. But I still didn’t have a way forward and risking leaving without a landing place felt inherently reckless. “Well, at least I have a paycheck” I said back to her. She prodded me on that. “And that’s what you’re all about, huh?” I knew what she was getting at. “But how can I leave, in good faith, without having my next thing in place, especially given my kids?” I asked. “You can trust what you’ve been given and signal to the universe that you’re open or you can continue denying the truth.” She made it sound so simple. Did I listen? No.

It took me a few more months and a whole lot more suffering to fathom that faith over fear might be the best bet. One day, after receiving lots of support from people who love me (amidst lots of tears) and in discernment with Tom Ott, I finally said it outl oud and owned my truth. I decided on a resignation date. I made the declaration public. I hoped graduate school would come through as an option (and it has.) Other things have come through too: a local project beyond my wildest dreams, facilitation gigs with two agencies I work for nationally, and a paid writing post. My God! I couldn’t have dreamed a better future for myself.
That’s the point.

For now we see in a mirror, dimly. We don’t know the future. But God does and I maintain God is way smarter than we are, holding the infinite possibilities for a variety of futures in Her loving, poetic heart. We only know what we are given in this moment. What I’ve learned this spring and summer is what we are given in this moment is enough. Choosing to believe the truth of what I was given and acting in faith made all the difference.

I have a certain confidence that if we all take exactly what we are given in Revision, believe the truth of it and act in faith, the future of FCC will be beyond what any of us can even imagine. May it be so. Amen.

Pastor Tom Ott--November/December Congregationalist

Lately I’ve been going through something of a spiritual slump.  I’ve continued my daily prayer practices as usual, but they haven’t been leading me to any profound spiritual awakenings for some time. I don’t feel my heart stirring with inspiration or a compelling vision of where God is leading me at this moment in my life. I’m just sort of in a holding pattern. 

I suspect I’ve needed some time to process some of the significant losses I’ve experienced in my life lately. Several people who have been important to my own spiritual life have either died or left or are close to death or soon to be leaving.  Sometimes we just have to stand still for a while until the weightiness of our grief subsides and we have the spiritual energy to move forward in faith again.

What has been particularly meaningful to me during my current spiritual slump is the inspiration I’ve found from the rest of you. This faith community has sustained and inspired me when I’ve had little inspiration to offer.

Truthfully, I was dreading the Under This Roof campaign to raise money for replacing the sanctuary roof. After finally paying off the mortgage from the huge renovation project we undertook nearly 16 years ago, I wasn’t feeling confident about our ability to raise the $120,000 we needed to replace the roof and repair the plaster. 

But the week after our One Body worship service when the Administration Team gathered to write thank you notes, I was elated to learn that we had already exceeded our project goal in three year pledges.

I know it is just a building, but your commitment to preserve this beautiful house of worship for future generations was inspiring to me. Thank you for helping to restore my confidence in our church.

As I’ve struggled with my own lack of a clear and compelling vision of where I see God leading our faith community, I’ve been deeply inspired by your willingness to enter into the ReVision communal discernment process. That is inspiring to me.  People involved in worship planning both on Sunday mornings and Wednesday evenings have been exploring the essential elements of spiritual discernment and are helping build our church’s capacity for the work of discerning God’s intended future. That is inspiring to me.
Lately, I’ve been holding the verse, “My grace is sufficient for you” from 2 Corinthians 12:9.  It has become a powerful word for me. It reminds me that I’m not the one who carries sole (soul) responsibility for the future of our church. It isn’t all on my shoulders and it doesn’t all depend on my insight and vision.

God’s grace is sufficient for me, for you, and for everyone. Sometimes I need to be surrounded by an amazing community of faithful people in order to remember that one foundational truth.